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Online (20 Minutes Ago): 5
The Lady Buxley PDF Print E-mail
Written by Angela Latoof Cagle   
Wednesday, 23 April 2008 09:31
 

TODAY AT NOON A DEATH WAS DISCOVERED
THREE WEEKS TOO LATE--A HORRIBLE BLUDGEON
THE FOWL SMELL AND FLIES LED TO THE DUNGEON.

THE PLACE THE LADY'S CADAVER WAS FOUND
WAS THE DEAD ONE'S DUNGEON ON THE COLD GROUND
SO THE POLICE WENT IN AND LOOKED AROUND.


WHAT MET THEIR EYES MADE THEM ALL TURN AWAY
WHAT MET THEIR NOSES MADE THEM THROW AWAY
THEY ALL CLOSED THEIR EYES AND TOOK TIME TO PRAY.


LADY ANNE BUXLEY WAS FOUND WITH FACE SQUENCHED
HER LEGS WERE BUCKLED, HER HANDS TIGHTLY CLENCHED.
HER MUSCLES RIGGORED, AND OH--WHAT A STENCH

T'WAS MID AUGUST WHEN THE REMAINS WERE FOUND
PERFECT TIMING FOR THE DECAY OF COMPOUNDS
BONES REMAINED SHOWED THE LADY HAD BEEN BOUND.


1984 HER HEARSE WAS DRIVEN
TEN 'TIL ONE HER EULOGY WAS GIVEN
CLOSE ONES IN BLACK WERE BAFFLED AND STRICKEN.


THE STARTLING NEWS OF HER EARLY DEMISE
LED TO QUESTIONS FROM INQUIRING MINDS
EVERYONE READYING HIS ALIBIS.


INVESTIGATORS INVESTIGATED
AND THEORISTS THEORIGATED
SO NEEDLESS TO SAY, BOTH SIDES DEBATED.


PEOPLE  BEGAN TO MUMBLE AND MURMUR
"WHO WOULD THEY ACCUSE AND TRY FOR MURDER
WHICH PERSON WOULD BECOME A PERJURER?


THE FACTS WERE GIVEN AS WELL AS THE CLUES
FOR PUBLIC HELP IN THIS TIME OF BEMUSE
SOON THEREAFTER, THERE WOULD BE AN ACCUSED.


SO FAMILY BACKGROUND IS GIVEN TO YOU
TO COMPILE THE FACTS, WHICH ARE FAR TOO FEW
ABOUT THE LADY WHO LIES 'FORE THE PEW.


INCIDENCES ABOUT TO BE RELAYED
OF FAMILY HISTORY AND ITS DECAY
ARE TO GATHER THE FACTS AND TO CONVEY.


TRAGEDY TORMENTED THEM THROUGH THE YEARS
A LOT OF EXCITEMENT, A LOT OF TEARS
SO SIT BACK AND RELAX, AND GRAB A BEER.


THE BUXLEY FAMILY WAS ONCE STRONG AND PROUD
BEFORE THE DEATHS MANY THOUGHT ODD AND AFOUL
THE FUTURE CLOUDED BY SORROWFUL SHROUDS.


LADY'S FATHER DIED OF SUFFOCATION
CAUSED BY SOME SMOKE AND GAS INHALATION
FROM THE GAS HEATER--NO VENTILATION.


HER FATHER'S DEATH COULD HAVE BEEN PREVENTED
IF DONE AS TOLD AND HAD THE ROOM VENTED
HE WOULDN'T LISTEN TO ANY OF IT.


HE HAD BEEN WARNED NOT TO USE HIS HEATER
EVERYDAY SLIPPING MORE OFF HIS TEETER
CONSTANTLY SEEKING HIS WIFE TO BEAT HER.



BARON BUXLEY WAS NOT ALWAYS THIS WAY
ONE DAY HE JUST STARTED TO GO ASTRAY
HE HAD ONLY TO POINT AND ALL OBEYED.


HIS SECRETARY HE OFT' ENTERTAINED
LITTLE OF THEIR TIME WAS SPENT WORK PERTAINED
FOR THREE YEARS HER SERVICES WERE RETAINED.


KIN AND COMRADES STUNNED AT HIS QUICK DEMISE
BUSINESS GOT BAD WITH EMPLOYEE UPRISE
SOMEONE STABLE HAD TO DIRECT AND GUIDES.


THE BOARD MET TO FIND A NEW PRESIDENT
KNOWING THE BUXLEYS HAD 60%
DID PUT THEM ALL IN A PREDICAMENT.


THERE WERE THREE BUXLEYS FROM WHOM THEY COULD CHOOSE
FIRST, HIS WIDOW (WHO THEY'D SURELY REFUSE)
HIS TWO DAUGHTERS CHECKED INTO WITH PERUSE.




THE BOARD WAS NOT KEEN ON MUM BUX BARONESS
THEY THOUGHT HER CRUDE AND QUITE LACIVIOUS
ALWAYS DRINKING AND SPENDING IN VEGAS.



MUM WASN'T RIGHT SINCE BIG DADDY'S DEATH
WANDERING A LOT AND TAKING TO BED
BUT RARELY ALONE, OR SO IT WAS SAID.


"MUM BUX" WAS DOWDY BUT PLEASANTLY SO
THINKING OF NEW THINGS TO KEEP ON THE GO
ATTRACTING MONEY HUNGRY GIGOLOS


SHE WAS OLDER AND BEGINNING AGAIN
HOOKING UP WITH VARIOUS "GENTLEMEN"
"TRYING TO START OVER, WAS THAT A SIN?".


SHE WORE HER SHIRT COLLARS HIGH UP HER NECK
HER SKIRTS WERE LONGISH AND SHOWED LITTLE LEG
BUT SLIPPED UP GREATLY WHEN SHE HIT THE KEG.


MUM BUX BECAME AWFULLY FRIENDLY WHEN DRUNK
MAKE-UP SETTLED IN HER WRINKLES LIKE GUNK
HER SHIRT COLLARS OPENING IN THE FRONT.


MONIQUE WAS ALWAYS JETTING ABOUT
FINDING AND SEEKING DIFFERENT MEN TO MOUNT
INDEED, FOLLOWING HER MOTHER, NO DOUBT.



MONIQUE (HIS CHILD) HAD THE BOARD'S DUE PROCESS
THOUGH SHE DALLIED 'BOUT IN THE SOUTHWEST
EXACTLY WHERE WOULD BE ANYONE'S GUESS.


SHE USED TO BE VIBRANT, NOT QUITE SO MEEK
PETITE, POLITE, PENSIVE, SLENDER, AND CHIC
SHE LOVED THE OUTDOORS, FAST CARS, AND ANTIQUES.



HER BOYFRIEND'S DEATH RIGHT AFTER HER FATHER
WAS WHEN HER MIND STARTED TO DO "WANDERS"
MEDICINES HELPED-- SHE WAS NOT A BOTHER.



(WHILE DIVING THE PACIFIC HIS AIR WENT
THE BOYFRIEND'S TANK FOUND WITH A HOLE AND DENT
AND APPARENTLY NOT AN ACCIDENT.)



THE BOARD ACKNOWLEDGED SHE WAS SOME BETTER
THE FOUR DIFFERENT PILLS SEEMED TO HELP HER
(ALTHOUGH IN TRUTH?  SHE WAS STILL A FRETTER.).

MONIQUE'S DRESS BECAME A LITTLE SLOPPY
AND HER ONCE NICE HAIR--OILY AND SOPPY
WHAT A SAD TURN-ABOUT PHILOSOPHY.



THE BARON'S OTHER DAUGHTER CONSIDERED
WAS NOT HIS FAVORED OR SPIRIT KINDRED
JUST SO YOU KNOW WHAT HIS FEELINGS RENDERED.


LADY ANN WAS BUXOM, WEALTHY AND FREE
QUITE DEEPLY AFFECTED BY GRAVITY
LOOKED 53 WHEN SHE WAS 33.



THE LADY WAS NOT DESIRABLE
HER LIPS WERE THIN AND SHE HAD NO EYEBROWS
ALWAY HELD TISSUES TO WIPE HER NOSTRILS.



THE THICKEST HAIR WAS ON HER UPPER LIP
WHERE HER TONGUE WOULD ALWAYS DISCREETLY SLIP
FOR WHEN LADY ANN TALKED, SHE OFTEN SPIT.




SHE HAD A SLIGHT LISP AND WINKED WHEN SHE TALKED
THIGHS RUBBING TOGETHER WHENEVER SHE WALKED
AND HER PERSONAL LIFE WAS NO CAKE WALK.




GENETICS WERE NOT KIND TO THE LADY
SHE WAS ENDOWED ONLY FINANCIALLY
FROM AN INHERITANCE LEFT BY DADDY.




THE LADY BUXLEY WAS QUITE THE DEVOUT
MANY CHURCHES RECEIVED MUCH OF HER POUCH
TO THIS THERE ARE MANY WILLING TO VOUCH




FROM HER DADDY'S DEATH SHE SOON RECOVERED
ROUND HER FAMILY SHE TOTALLY HOVERED
SO THE BOARD CHOSE HER TO LEAD AND GOVERN




THAT IS THE GIST OF THE FAMILY HIST
THERE'S ANOTHER TIME CHANGE SO DON'T BE PISSED
SO NOW WE GO TO THE DAY HER DEATH KISSED.




T"WAS LADY BUXLEY'S CELEBRATION DAY
FOR BIRTH AND FOR HER INHERITANCE PAY
AND A NUMBER OF MILLIONS CAME HER WAY.




BARON BUXLEY'S DEATH LEFT HER AS HIS HEIR
SHE MADE EXECUTOR AND MILLIONAIRE
WAS ALWAYS GENEROUS AND ALWAYS FAIR.




A BIRTHDAY PARTY GATHERED TO WITNESS
ALL OF THE CANDLES WHICH MOCKED AND GLISTENED
EVERYONE SPOKE, BUT THEN SHUSHED TO LISTEN.




"THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR CHARMING ATTENDANCE--
MAKING MY DAY GREAT AND UNPRETENTIOUS
DAD'S DEATH, MY WRECK HAVE ME APPREHENSIVE.




SHE WAS ABOUT TO GO ON, THEN SHE PAUSED,
HER EYES WERE BLACKENED AND FACE WRAPPED IN GAUZE
LADY'S CAR WRECK WEEKS AGO WAS THE CAUSE.




SHE'D BEEN IN A COMA FOR 2O WEEKS
THE PHYSICIAN FELT THE OUTCOME WAS BLEAK
SURPRISINGLY WOKE UP HER BIRTHDAY WEEK.




THIRD DEGREE BURNS COVERED HER HANDS AND FACE
HER LIP MUSCLES QUIVERED AND TEARS WERE TRACED
HER APPEARANCE WAS A SOCIAL DISGRACE.




(HER CAR EXPLODED AND FELL IN THE BRINE
LADY WAS PULLED OUT IN THE NICK OF TIME
SHE WAS NO GREAT BEAUTY, SO NO GREAT CRIME.)



HER VOICE WAS STILL HOARSE FROM HER INJURIES
T'WAS SO HARD TO ANSWER THE INQUIRIES
THE FOLLOWING SPEECH TOOK HER ENERGIES:




"I ACCEPT THE RESPONSIBILITY
TO LEAD WITH COMPASSIONABILITY
ALL TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY".




"FOR THE DEPRIVED I'VE SET EIGHT MILL ASIDE
FOUR MILLION FOR SOCIAL NEEDS, MAYBE FIVE...
THERE ARE SO MANY WHO NEED, MORE THAN I"




EVERYONE CHEERED HER FOR HER LACK OF GREED
MADE HER FEEL SPECIAL IN HER TIME OF NEED
SHE APPEARED MUCH MORE CAREFREE, NOT SO GRIEVED--



AND SHE SIPPED CHAMPAGNE AS GIFTS WERE OPENED
SMILES HERE AND THERE FOR EXPENSIVE TOKENS
EVERYONE THERE WAS LAUGHING AND JOKING.




WHAT FUN THEY ALL HAD DRINKING AND SMOKING
(THEY FORGOT HER FACE WAS BURNED AND BROKEN)
HAVING GREAT FUN SLOW DANCING AND GROPING.



LADY BUXLEY RECEIVED MANY PRESENTS
A WATCH, A WALLET, AND SOME AGING HINTS
A FANCY PHONE AND EXPENSIVE BATH SCENTS.




THE HEIRLOOM WATCH WAS STUDDED WITH RUBIES
LATTICE WORK SHOWED ALL ITS INTRICACIES
THE TIME IT KEPT UNTIL THE NTH DEGREE.




THE WONDERFUL WATCH CAME FROM HER DEAR MUM
WHOSE FINANCIAL STATEMENT WAS QUITE A SUM
MUM WAS LATER PUT IN AN ASYLUM.




THE ELABORATE GREEN EEL SKIN WALLET
WAS PERFECT, NEEDED, AND LIKED QUITE A LOT
A GIFT THAT WAS NEVER TO BE FORGOT


PRESENTED THE WALLET WAS MR. TATE
HE WAS LADY'S SOLICITOR AND DATE
HE WOULD LOSE MORE THAN  COMPANION AND MATE.




HE WAS THE MAN THE LADY ANN ADDRESSED
AND ALSO THE MAN FOR WHOM SHE UNDRESSED
WHO IN HIS RIGHT MIND WOULD EVER HAVE GUESSED?




HIS PINK SKIN WAS ALL COVERED WITH FRECKLES
FOR WHICH HE OFT' RECEIVED JOKES AND HECKLES
HIS HAIR WAS PEACHY--HIS BRAIN TECHNICAL




HIS GIRTH WAS ASTOUNDING WITHOUT HIS SHIRT
ALWAYS COMPLAINED HIS BODY GIRDLE  HURT
WHO WOULD WANT TO DATE THE OBNOXIOUS JERK?




TATE ALWAYS SCRATCHED AND DUG AT HIS BODY
CLAIMS HE'S SOME KIND OF "MAGNUM CUM LAWDY"
CHORTLES HE'S THIRTY--HE'S REALLY FORTY.



HE WATCHED AND OGLED ALL THE FEMALE GOWNS
AND HE WAS AT THEIR SIDES SHOULD THEY LEAN DOWN
SPECULATIVE OF THEIR SIZES ENDOWED.




MR. TATE WAS A TRUE CREEP OF A CHAP
HIS HAIR WAS OILY AND HIS TEETH WERE GAPPED
AND TINGED WITH YELLOW FROM ALL OF THE PLAQUE.




THE REST OF THE LADY BUXLEY  MYSTERY WILL SOON BE PURCHASEABLE THROUGH THIS SITE. 
THE LACIVIOUS LADY PROVES TO BE QUITE THE GIFT.

E-MAIL ( This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it )  IF YOU WISH TO PURCHASE THE REST OF THIS BOOK.

 


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Comments
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Susan - 05-27-2008 08:13

I think this is a mystery tis true and for those who know, perhaps a clue.......
Poetry in Commotion
Mean Dean - 05-14-2008 09:56

Intrigued by "make-up settled in her wrinkles like gunk" Reminded me of working with gas station "Gunk" When cleaning parts and tools - really stunk. And "sizes endowed' are watched by most men Like Tony Danza on "The View" today - is when As Sherry sat on the floor and boobs were open A D-cup is a boon for most of us guys Boggles our mind and widens our eyes So both sexes - really comes down to size
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Last Updated on Tuesday, 19 August 2008 09:51